Talking about yout fetish

[steve70]

Does anybody ever try to talk about their interest in quicksand just to "fish" to see if they may be interested as well?

A few months ago I was talking to a friend online, to get round to the subject of quicksand I said that I'd been discussing scary ways to die with somebody online. I told him that I'd come up with drowning in quicksand, and we ended up having a long discussion about it. He found the entire idea of sinking in quicksand "for real" to be scary. But he is also a professional actor, so I asked him if he would be prepared to film a quicksand scene for a film/TV, knowing it was all "staged" for the camera, there was no real danger etc. He sad he would, and would do whatever he needed to do for it.

So there you have it. Just wondered if anybody else has tried to discuss their interest with someone who wasn't part of the community, how they went about it and what response they got?

[DJlurker]

Nope, not really. The few times I’ve been seen covered in mud, I’d just say that I tripped and fell in the swamp or something along those lines.

[Palinov Jensen]

I will answer this from the opposite prospective while respecting the privacy of the person involved. Years ago, I met him online, shortly after we met he alluded to having a fetish I didn't know about and told me I'd never guess what it is! Not knowing what his other fetish was drove me insane, so one day I decided to play the guessing game. After several failed attempts at getting the right answer, he gave me a few movies as hints and after researching one of the movies, I discovered his fetish for quicksand! My response was, "You're the coolest guy on the planet!" I honestly thought he was the coolest guy on the planet and I still do!

Being the open minded person that I am, and because I cared about this person (I still do), I decided to do research on quicksand fetishism, got to know what made him tick, asked questions, watch videos ect.. and use that information to engage with him and his fetish to the best of my ability. Along the way, I've realized that there are things about quicksand that appeal to my own sexual interest, which makes engaging with him easier than it was when we hardly knew each other. Our relationship has gotten to the point where 95% percent of our conversations are either about quicksand or casually mention something quicksand related!

There are things I'm still uncomfortable with as far as him and myself being in actual quicksand is concerned, but I love my friend and I'm willing to put the uncomfortable aside if it means he gets to live out his fantasies. Well, if we ever meet in person, that is.

There's a book I've been reading called "Fetish and You" by Jackie A. Castro that has several chapters dedicated to sharing your fetish with a partner. I've only skimmed through those chapters so far, but I think they would help greatly if you read them. I'm sure they will help me too, once I have a chance to read them!

[Fred588]

My opinion only:

There are two kinds of people in the world with respect to admitting they have some sort of fetish, kind, turn-on, etc. We have names for both groups. One group is called "people who will admit to such an interest". The other group is called "liars."

[Mixman]

Everything depends on the degree of intimacy. The closer a person is to me, the easier it is for me to share with him.
For example, my wife knows about my hobby. But the problem is that we do not have the opportunity to realize something together at the moment.
Talk to someone else on this topic, I would not.
I'm afraid that I will find such a person once, but I can not be closer because of the family. And my principle - while I'm family, no other relationship with anyone.
If to think - what would I choose - my family, or little-known person with similar interests, I would choose the first... because my interests break out and subside. And life is so single...

[dlodoski]

My opinion only:

There are two kinds of people in the world with respect to admitting they have some sort of fetish, kind, turn-on, etc. We have names for both groups. One group is called "people who will admit to such an interest". The other group is called "liars."

Practicing discretion it not necessarily dishonest.

[Duncan Edwards]

I've had this interest all my life and thought I was alone with it until Feb. 1995. In all my 55 years I have never discussed it outside of other fetishists unless it was to help explain things to models. Most of them are open to anything being "normal" because they've made a career of it. "Normal" people would never understand so why bother?

[mud_dreamer]

To date, I have only talked about it here.

I believe that if there was ever a perfectly safe opportunity in very "clean" (not smelly) mud, I would somehow get my wife to step into it just to see if she finds something sensuous about it.

We trout fish together and sometimes we find spots were the mud is kind of deep and sticky. She has gotten a little stuck in the mud. If I went out to "save" her and kind of got stuck myself (or visa versa)... hey ... you never know.

She is the only one that I would ever want to experience this with. Otherwise, keeping this a solo and personal experience is perfectly fine with me.

Thanks steve70 for creating this thread!

[quagmire_uk]

Told my girlfriend about my fetish just a few months into us becoming a couple.

I felt comfortable telling her because (1) she made a joke about naked mud wrestling me to settle an arguement (total random coincidence!), and then (2) she was happy to open up to me about her own kinks.

I had told her how I had been involved with a Japanese anime society back when I was in university, and she told me how when she was a teenager/young adult she had been an anime fan. That led onto her saying that her friends had gotten hold of some hentai, and she'd admitted to enjoying tentacle hentai scenes, and other sex scenes with monsters such as demons or orcs or zombies.

She considered it a guilty pleasure, and she was surprised at herself because normally she doesn't enjoy anything 'rapey'. But she discovered she enjoyed it because the tentacle monsters were mindless beasts or plants, so the 'unfortunate' female victims were not subject to the malice of some horrible human being. Instead it was an unfeeling biological imperative, or a supernatural force. (And when it came to evil demons or orcs, well, 'that's just what they do', you can't really criticise a demon from hell for satisfying its own lust at the expense of others.)

So given that she enjoyed stories and videos involving strange sci-fi/supernatural sexual situations, it wasn't a big leap for me to tell her my fetish.

Rather than just telling her, I told her by making up a little story starring her, that I told to her in the second person.

I said "So you're an explorer, travelling through the jungle...", and spent a while setting up the scene, making her wonder what was coming. Then I described her stumbling into a quicksand bog, how when she tries to pull her legs out the mud undulates around her, and bubbles and squelches. How she tries to walk or crawl back to safer ground, but every movement and struggle makes her sink deeper. And then when she sinks up to her safari shorts, she can feel the mud pressing against her intimate parts, and with each struggle to escape it feels like the quicksand is sucking and slurping her body. That it is being like caught in a giant mouth, that is hungry to eat her, but which also likes to tease and lick her. The squelches and slurps sound like sex, and her grunts and moans of effort could be mistaken for sounds of pleasure. The ooze is sucking her down to her doom, and as she fights against it, the sensations are causing her own body to betray her, she has to fight that as well...

She totally got it. Athough she doesn't share my fetish, she understands it, she enjoyed the story I told her and she gets what it is that does it for me. She likes to playfully tease me about quicksand stuff sometimes as well.

[reisen55]

Care to be taken on this one. In my first marriage, my wife LOVED the fantasy and whenever we made love, I would spin a tale and she would enthusiastically join in. Wonderful, right? She was also a multi-drug addict and when divorce came (only 3 years of that hell), her lawyer looked at the facts and realized she was doomed unless she could be as nasty and bad as she could be - scare me back perhaps - so she wrote up the quicksand fantasy, and tentacle fantasy, in her counter-claim in fine legal detail with dry words that ruined my open exposure. Horrible beyond words. Years later my second wife asked about my fantasies and I delayed - not comfortable really and for years that has been so. My quicksand fantasy is entirely captured in my first wife. Recently, my second spouse enthusiastically endorsed the idea saying it is totally erotic and sexual = wonderful and sometimes we go there, sometimes not.