50 shades?

[nachtjaeger]

The reviews of the "Atlas Shrugged" movie were so bad I didn't even bother seeing it. Ayn Rand- love her or hate her, there was a writer who desperately needed an editor with a sharp pencil- or better yet, a chainsaw. "Atlas Shrugged" may be one of those books, like Frank Herbert's "Dune", that is simply unfilmable.

As to "worst movie ever" I submit "Starcrash", aka "The Adventures of Stella Star." What makes this one so bad IMHO is that it could just as easily been a great movie. The first time I watched it, I thought that the parts which would have made the plot hang together must have ended up on the cutting-room floor. Apparently a lot of good footage joined them there.

As a runner-up, I would suggest "White Commanche" (1968). In this one, William Shatner plays a dual role as both Cowboy Johnny Moon and his ruthless Indian twin brother (?) Notah. The problem here is, Shatner can't act his way out of a wet paper sack. Even with the costume changes, you can't tell the characters apart. Both of them are Shatner, which makes the movie damned confusing.

Ed Wood may have been one of the worst movie makers ever,but he did help care for one of my old time fave horror actors Bela Lugosi.

Want a real snore fest? How about the whole latest series of Atlas Shrugged movies? I only got past the first. One of my lady pals was trying to sell me on the ideas of that sociopathic asshole Ayn Rand. So I agreed to watch this movie based on her boring encyclopedic hack job. Jesus Christ ate a can of beans! What a tripe! Even my friend said it sucked! She actually said it didn't reveal Ayns SUPERIOR intellect!

[Cuthbert]

Books I'd like to see adapted for film.

1. The sci-fi writer Jack Vance's set of stories called The five demon princes. Hell the sci-fi channel could make it into a five part series. I think it would be great.

2.Tannith Lee's The secret books of Paradys. Another that would be in segmented form. This set of tales is TRUE gothic! Dark,visceral,and frightening. Some parts of that book actually scared me. And that happens very rarely!

3.A film adaption of the book Crazy Diamond was rumoured. About the late and very great Syd Barrett. It was shot down by Roger Waters of Pink Floyd if I remember. It might be better it not be made though. Because us rabid fans would go all crazy apeshit if they got it wrong!

4.And for fucks sake? All these fantasy book adaptations,and they forget one of the goddamned best? You brits know who I'm talking about! Michael Moorcock's Elric of Melnibone! But that's another one if they did it wrong......

5.And I'd die to see a film adaption of the lives of two great jazz composers. Louis Armstrong or Jelly Roll Morton. But I suspect it would be quite hard to cast it though.

And HBO did the Game of thrones. BUT Daenaerys eyes are VIOLET Damn it! They couldn't use contact lenses? Sigh......

[Duncan Edwards]

I heard a couple of fetish models discussing the book and they both agreed it was pretty minor league. A little "cuff play" didn't impress them very much. Now, let's look at someone to whom this entire concept is new and "wild and kinky". My wife. There are times when, despite my subtle efforts, she makes Ellie Mae Clampett look like Malificent. She bought into the hype, read the book, and has been anxiously awaiting the movie. We will see it together but I feign disinterest and am waiting to see her reaction. Let's just say there are a lot of folks who could benefit from a "bad" movie.

[Nessie]

I heard a couple of fetish models discussing the book and they both agreed it was pretty minor league.

I was a member of Fetlife in an attempt to promote my video work and bring fans to this forum. The book was released around then and I sure did see what Fetlife thought of it!

It was, overwhelmingly:

"Not much."

Fetlife in general was unimpressed with "50 Shades" because it was, just as your models said, minor league to them, plus they thought that the author didn't understand them, their fantasies or anything they did. These were people who sported real whip welts on their backs and showed off the bruises they received during spanking play. Talk about "safewords" and "hard limits" was everywhere, as was bondage of all kinds.

One fellow proudly showed off his destroyed buttocks for all to see (a caning?) which received quite a lot of negative feedback as it was likely to leave permanent scars.

My own boredom with "50 Shades" stems from browsing on Fetlife trying to snag something for me, the quicksand fetish in general and bring the unenlightened Quicksanders here, and receiving an overdose of BDSM instead. I still do not know exactly what I am, or what quirk in my physiology or psyche has made me love to sink in quicksand...but I sure know what didn't cause it and it's everything they're doing over there.

Eventually I closed my account. Back to the bog for me. That said, if you're exploring, not sure who you are or what you want to do, you could consider joining as they have everything.

We will see it together but I feign disinterest and am waiting to see her reaction. Let's just say there are a lot of folks who could benefit from a "bad" movie.

My fingers are crossed, for this just might be the start of something awesome for you. From the bottom of my sinky little heart, I wish you the best of luck with this.

Nessie

[Duncan Edwards]

My fingers are crossed, for this just might be the start of something awesome for you. From the bottom of my sinky little heart, I wish you the best of luck with this.

Nessie

Thank you. I'm realistic about it. At our age it would be a mistake to expect a dramatic change in anything. On the other hand, any change at all would be dramatic. She saw 9 1/2 Weeks on cable the first year we were married and I'm expecting a similar reaction.

I guess the point I'm trying to make with all of this is there are a number of totally uninitiated out there who will find this to be a lot racier than many of us. Of course most of them are 16 and not fifty something.

[Cuthbert]

That latest Dracula movie had an interesting affect on my boyfriend

[Nessie]

She saw 9 1/2 Weeks on cable the first year we were married and I'm expecting a similar reaction.

I remember that movie. A friend told me it was hot. But I took a serious dislike to the character played by Mickey Rourke. The movie might been hotter if I hadn't coldly wished I could kick that jerk off a cliff.

But the food scene sure was fun, especially when the honey dribbled. I wanted to do that with some guy who wasn't the guy in the movie. And -- definitely -- in somebody else's kitchen. (Notice the movie never tells you who cleaned it up.)

At the time I called it "playful". Years later, I found UMD and discovered that what happened in this scene had a name: "WAM Fetish".

Nessie

[Duncan Edwards]

She saw 9 1/2 Weeks on cable the first year we were married and I'm expecting a similar reaction.

I remember that movie. A friend told me it was hot. But I took a serious dislike to the character played by Mickey Rourke. The movie might been hotter if I hadn't coldly wished I could kick that jerk off a cliff.

But the food scene sure was fun, especially when the honey dribbled. I wanted to do that with some guy who wasn't the guy in the movie. And -- definitely -- in somebody else's kitchen. (Notice the movie never tells you who cleaned it up.)

At the time I called it "playful". Years later, I found UMD and discovered that what happened in this scene had a name: "WAM Fetish".

Nessie

I always thought it was part of my "wanting to molest Kim Basinger" fetish.

Yeah, can you imagine Mickey Roarke's maid coming in the next morning and having to clean all that up? I spent a lot of time thinking about the shower scene that they never shot too. That would have been fun.

What's amazing is how many women respond to a jerk like that. Being a jerk is one card I've never played so far as I'm aware. You have to know it to do it that well. Never cared much for women that I had to tell everything to do though. Whimpy women make great fantasy but sorry long term relationships. I guess that's why it only went nine and half weeks.

[Duncan Edwards]

This is good. Paris Kennedy tweets -

Paris Kennedy ‏@pariskennedy 9h9 hours ago

"Zero Fucks of Grey, can't wait until everyone forgets about that shit."

[Nessie]

What's amazing is how many women respond to a jerk like that. Being a jerk is one card I've never played so far as I'm aware. You have to know it to do it that well. Never cared much for women that I had to tell everything to do though. Whimpy women make great fantasy but sorry long term relationships. I guess that's why it only went nine and half weeks.

You're a guy and I will bet you never read "bodice-rippers".

They are romances and/or graphic porn for women, dressed up as "historical gothic novels". They always show a manly macho man in old-fashioned clothing with ripped muscles clutching a lady in a long gown with cleavage and flowing hair, who often looks like she is about to faint.

Many of them do have lively plots, mystery, intrigue, and wonderfully hateful villains -- it's not all spent on sex. So they can be entertaining to read, especially when you're still young and love fantasy. I had a gal pal who was addicted to these when I was in high school so we would read the books and then lend them to each other.

I can remember, about 150 pages into one...

"Well, the story is pretty good and it's a cool idea -- but I'm getting too mad to enjoy this. I want to write a different version..."

Alternate Plot Line:

The lady in the long historical gown runs over the "leading man" with her horse, and a hoof hits a very sensitive man-spot. While he writhes in agony on the muddy ground, a cute, nice guy with a heart of gold who treats her like a queen and believes that she is very beautiful will somehow enter the plot. While Mr. Jerk is still shuddering on the ground and clutching his balls, Lady and Good Guy make out hotly under a tree. This is the best sex she's ever had with a man who deserves to have it, so she flips the jerk the bird and runs off to marry the good guy.

Obviously there is a market, though, or those books wouldn't sell so well.

You know what? I saw the preview for "50 Shades" and it seems like the guy does have a Bodice-Ripper Leading Man personality.

Nessie