Quicksand Fans

Black Clay Lord wrote:Well this is the one I'm talking about. It goes, and I quote...

"Hello, attractive women. You've reached Strong Bad. If you're not an attractive woman, please hang up the phone. If you are an attractive woman... Please purchase a hot and some pork rinds, and invite me over. See you in your dreams."

SinkerCutie wrote:This one. Particularly to telemarketers.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=enJGpuhpy3g

Mynock wrote:When I moved into my first apartment the cable company, in a package deal kind of thing gave me a digital phone along with my TV and Broadband. They assigned me a number that I quickly learned used to belong to a guy name "Gary".

For two weeks I was getting calls from Gary's dentist about rescheduling an appointment, for some reason I just could not get through to this secretary chick (same one every time??!!!?) that this was not Gary's number anymore.

Finally I decided to get creative.
/phone rings
Me: Hello?
Her: Hi! This is So & So Dental calling! Is Gary home?
Me (doing my best Hannibal Lector impression): Gary? Hmmmm..... Gary.....Gary....oh yes. I remember Gary. He was delicious.
/hangs up phone.

Never called back again.

Nessie wrote:A few years back my (now defunct) landline rang and it was that IRS scam where everybody who ever called seemed to have an Indian accent. It was that scam where, if you go along with them far enough, they tell you they'll arrest you unless pay your "debt" to the government with a gift card from Walmart.

I was going to report it to authorities, but it had already been reported a gazillion times. It was on scam-alert websites plus, I'd seen this scam on the news too.

Asking to be put on the Do Not Call list doesn't work for obvious reasons.

So the next time they called, I went pure psycho. Hey, I have acting experience! You know, from doing quicksand videos!

They hung up on me. But I did that thing where you dial a couple digits and the last number that called you phone shows up. I dialed that number. In a little foreign accent they answered, "IRS" and I let loose a loud torrent of abuse, name-calling and obscenities.

They hung up. I called them again. They picked up and I called them every name I could think of between F-words until they cut me off by hanging up.

So I called again.

And they let it ring. It rang over and over again. I noted with smiling satisfaction that they had no answering machine at that number, so they were forced to listen to it ring...and ring...

...KNOWING what was on the other end.

I gave it, oh, 25, 30 rings, enough to let it really sink in, and then I hung up.

Days passed, and I did not hear from them.

I had made it to their Do Not Call.

Nessie

Kinky Desires wrote:I had this as my voicemail for ages until my mum got fed up with it and begged me to change it! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p5VrhcwH6Tg

Tim Kelly wrote:I would like to have the Borg Greeting from Star Trek TNG, the full length version, something like:
"We are the Borg. Existence as you know it is at an end. Your technological and biological uniqueness will be added to our own. Resistance is futile. We are unable to assimilate you at the moment, but if you leave your name and number we will assimilate you on our return. Resistance is futile. PLease speak after the tone.We are the Borg".