quicksand dating

[512jiw]

I have a question.. I'm new to this particular site/community, not new to qs . However , my wife of 3 years is not interested in my little secret.
I was curious if anyone has had problems with this.. giving up the whole idea, abandoning it just , ha , doesn't work. ( who'd want to???)
She found videos stored and Yada yada...Yada....
I'm upset. I work my ass off to have a nice home, keep the place in clean order and fit the bill as a "good" husband . I was still shy about talking about qs with anyone , including her in our early stages of our relationship. Now it's strained and I'm not sure just how it's going to go.. give up qs?? A divorce ??? Eeesh.
Man oh man. The need to be open and honest from the get go sure would have been the better route...
I'm bummed... nice to be here ..:]

[06_Sonic]

Now it's strained and I'm not sure just how it's going to go.. give up qs?? A divorce ??? Eeesh.

You don't need to go as far as a divorce! She might not understand your, how to make this not sound weird, hobby. But just make sure your relationship stays stable. Definitely more important than qs in my opinion.

[Duncan Edwards]

I have a question.. I'm new to this particular site/community, not new to qs . However , my wife of 3 years is not interested in my little secret.
I was curious if anyone has had problems with this.. giving up the whole idea, abandoning it just , ha , doesn't work. ( who'd want to???)
She found videos stored and Yada yada...Yada....
I'm upset. I work my ass off to have a nice home, keep the place in clean order and fit the bill as a "good" husband . I was still shy about talking about qs with anyone , including her in our early stages of our relationship. Now it's strained and I'm not sure just how it's going to go.. give up qs?? A divorce ??? Eeesh.
Man oh man. The need to be open and honest from the get go sure would have been the better route...
I'm bummed... nice to be here ..:]

Go on about your life and say no more about it. That doesn't mean you don't casually participate, just don't drag her into it. Many people simply aren't geared for kink and there's no point in trying to make it part of her life. If that's all it takes to get to a divorce then you've got bigger problems lurking out there.

[512jiw]

I know this isn't a counseling forum.. haha
But the advice is appreciated. My wife and I have a few things we've been trying to smoothen out in our relationship. I do need to focus on the aspects that make our marriage strong.. and if it's just this one thing that's going to hinder it... well maybe I have to just put it on the back burner and get over it, (somehow, I don't have any idea how)
Anyways thanks again for the replies. You guys are right.
Take care
eric

[beachbum]

I have a question.. I'm new to this particular site/community, not new to qs . However , my wife of 3 years is not interested in my little secret.
I was curious if anyone has had problems with this.. giving up the whole idea, abandoning it just , ha , doesn't work. ( who'd want to???)
She found videos stored and Yada yada...Yada....
I'm upset. I work my ass off to have a nice home, keep the place in clean order and fit the bill as a "good" husband . I was still shy about talking about qs with anyone , including her in our early stages of our relationship. Now it's strained and I'm not sure just how it's going to go.. give up qs?? A divorce ??? Eeesh.
Man oh man. The need to be open and honest from the get go sure would have been the better route...
I'm bummed... nice to be here ..:]

512jw - Send me a PM. I am in almost exactly the same situation as you. I will describe in more detail.